@fernando My mother was really worried when she heard you tried to blackmail your team in the past Fernando. She said maybe I should get a new mentor to help me get a race drive.

@fernando Cool Fernando, I knew I could rely on you. Austin is brilliant, you'll love the track, I'll tell you all about it when I see you in India.

@fernando What's a battering ram Fernando, is that some kind of new FIA safety test?

I don't get it Fernando, I thought Sebastian was penalised for overtaking Jenson off the track, I didn't know he had stolen a chicken.

@fernando My mother always tells me chicken can be really dangerous Fernando, you can get salmonella if it isn't cooked right.

@fernando It was fun Fernando but I got a bit freaked out on Sunday. Who was the weird guy with the cap on the podium after the race? I think it might have been that crazy priest who ran onto the track years ago.

@fernando I'm not sure Fernando, I'll do anything to be in my car on the track, but running on it sounds really dangerous, I might get hit.

I'm never going to get on a list like this unless I can get a proper race drive Fernando.

@fernando That sounds cool, I don't always feel very wanted at Lotus. Is the FBI a bit like the FIA Fernando?

@fernando I am a bit nervous Fernando, my mum said it is very important to make a good first impression.

@fernando I'm not sure Fernando, it's a bit tricky at the moment, when my mum heard the news about Bernie getting married she was angry and said it was about time for me to get a nice girl and settle down.

@mschumi I don't get it Fernando. If Mark needs four wheels then how many does Sebastian need?

@fernando That's weird, I thought all cars had four wheels.

@fernando Oh yeah, I didn't think of that. I'll ask the guys in the garage if they'll let me try it at the next practice session.

How are we going to do a 200% race Fernando, I thought percentage could never be above 100?

@fernando That sounds kind of weird Fernando, I think I'll ring my Mom and check with her. She told me I should ask her before I take any of your advice from now on.

@fernando I'm glad you're still looking out for me Fernando, to be honest Michael sounds a bit scary. Although, when I mentioned to my mother about having a mentos she said I was eating too much sugar already.

@fernando I'm only allowed to drink Coke on my birthday Fernando. That sounds a bit weird but I'll definitely give it a try.

What's a crash test Fernando? I'm a test driver and they told me crashing is a bad thing to do.

@fernando Why would you say that Fernando, I read on the internet that it's safest to be in a Virgin?