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fernando's Latest Posts
fernando   Fernando Alonso
@hammy telemetry
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@hammy Bla.....bbering top secret information to every Tom, Dick, and Mary on the internet. You and Maldonaldo are merely vicitms of your own stupidity.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
Jackie'll Fix it, GrosjeanMassa, ever wonder why your car got so much better when I needed you to take points off the others. THink about that when you're having "setup problems" next saeson.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@wibbah As long as it doesn't look awesome when it's flippin'. Remember your last time at Le Mans in that Merc, I think you still hold the lap record there for a car travelling upside down.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@Horner Funny, that's about as much notice as you gave him when you swapped his front wing on Vettel's car back in Siverstone 2010. I'm not sure Webber wasn't fibbing when he said the new regulations were more of an issue than the Seb-factor.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
Christ almighty Horner, "extensive" achievements, "support his decision", given you have the emotional capacity of a stuffed owl, you could at least try and pretend you'll miss the guy.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@hammy So you can put on those gigantic man-earrings more like, NASA could use those to replace the mirror on the Hubble. It might be wise to add a button back in to tell you when to turn in to the correct pit garage.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@diResta Actually, I heard your team was alarmed your head had swollen to twice it's normal size in the humidity, so retired you on safety grounds. They only realised that it was natural when you took your helmet off. Take heart, you're about as miserable as everyone was on the podium.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@Horner I would say the most cringeworthy moment on Sunday's coverage was Vettel's post-race "apology", but then I was still recovering from hearing a be-spectacled Suzi Perry saying "here comes the science bit" on the BBC pre-show. Bring back Eddie Jordan.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@wibbah To be fair Webber, when Horner was interviewed on the pitwall after the race he looked apoplectic... sorry, wrong adjective... he looked apologetic... no, wrong again... oh yeah, he looked absolutely fucking delighted. Given he usually shows as much natural emotion as a stunned mackerel it was strange to see him grinning from ear to ear for once.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@SuzukiPerry Ah yes, you made your name taking the piss out of F1, by your own admission you hate travelling and know nothing about the sport. Maybe try out for the anchor job in the Vatican the next time, you're about as well qualified for that one.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@massa The only thing I'll be watching for is to see if Sleepy Perry pronounces your name right "Massay". On that subject, we're all for giving you a chance Suzi, but try to look half awake in Sepang. Your energy levels in Australia make Kimi look like Jackie Chan on speed.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@Horner Jesus, "survive", cut the melodrama Horner. You're starting to sound as paranoid as my teammate. Strange how you're the dog's proverbials when you win and then everyone else is to blame when you get beaten, very Red Bull.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@mschumi Better be careful there Michael or Hamilton might go all "gangsta" on you. Remember he is H.A.M.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@hammy They weren't so much tears of joy, but a mixture of amusement and acute pain. I nearly ruptured my spleen I laughed so hard. You might do well to listen to some of those idiot ex-drivers.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
I think I had a fairly good insight into the "real you" before Hamilton but I have to say this brought tears to my eyes.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@massa Yeah, you spun me round and I still came back and beat you. That collision will cost you about three tenths when I'm adjusting your car set-up with your mechanics during the season. I've a feeling 2013 might be more "absurd" thank you expect.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@massa Well, no talented drivers would have. By the way I'm saving my emotion for my Oscar acceptance speech. "He is one of the best in the world" - I'm still not sure how I managed to say that with a straight face.
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fernando   Fernando Alonso
@SuzukiPerry Shouldn't that be Jerez? Oh I see, the bikes are at Sepang. This is almost as depressing as the day I saw the "MotoGp News" section appear on Autosport.com. Come back Jim Rosenthal, all is forgiven.
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